alright well, here we are again. well not we, me.  What do you know it has been 3 months since I have blogged and I have the urge at 3 am.  I thought to myself, " I miss my blog.  Yes, yes I miss my blog and My public needs me. "  well maybe not, I have been singing Phantom of the Opera songs in my head for a few days now and that line in the movie keeps playing out in my head.  Really, I need my public.  The funny thing is, I probably don't have a public anymore, all six of them have left and why wouldn't they ? I have abandoned the blogger world once again.  I knew it was time to blog again.  I suddenly started thinking up random posts while I was cleaning.  Having conversations with my blog.  I have not been a good friend to my blog.  Enough of that, let's just get on to the musings of my mind.  Let me explain the time here.  3 am is actually my favorite time to blog.  Everyone is asleep and the house is quiet, but that is not the reason for the time of my blogging today.  I mean, I would not purposely set my alarm for 3 am and leave a restful sleep.  My poor husband has a terrible cough and the past 3 nights has had some coughing fits and he is such a gifted sleeper, he sleeps through, but me on the other hand, not a gifted sleeper even with a sleep aid have been awake the last 3 nights in a row.  I even ask him about his cough the next morning and he can't hardly even remember!  amazing.  Moving forward.

   So as it turns out I am signed up for my first triathlon.  It all started back in June, sitting on the front yard at my friend Teri's house talking to our neighbor Jayna and asking about her marathon training.  She also does Tri's and she is really good at it and trains all the time. Teri said I am gonna do one! and then she looked at me. I said, me too! yeah let's do it! wahoo!  Jayna looked at us and said, " Awesome! you guys should totally do one."  Then she turned her head and said what I am now sure was an under the breath, "Suckas!" So, here I am now training for something that sort of terrifies me.  Mainly because I can't swim.  It is a considerable concern to have.  I have been going to spin classes and running and lifting weights.  It is a lot of work, but I think it is going to get me through the winter.  I didn't realize how badly I needed a goal.  I needed to commit myself to something.  I grew up playing sports and pushing myself and now that I am doing that again  I realize how desperately I have missed it.  I have been so much happier now that I am working out.  I look forward to my spin classes.  I have to get a babysitter to get to one of them because Dave does not get home on time.  Well, I have a love/hate relationship with spin.  In the middle of the work out I can't wait for it to be over, but then I feel so good after and so proud of myself.  I have had to give up T.V. at night though.  At first I missed my shows ( we have no DVR and now that I am thinking about it a tear is welling up as I type ) no actually I don't really miss it as much as I thought I would.  I was in the habit of getting the kids settled and then just unwinding in front of the T.V. with Dave.  I think it is well worth it though.  Dave has been so supportive to let me go to the gym nearly every night and then when I get home he goes.  I have mentioned on here before that I have struggled with post pardom deppression and I have been trying to figure out how to combat that over the past few years.  I told my doctor I felt like I had not control over my life and that it was controlling me.  So this year, I am taking back the control and it feels good.  well enough for now, I really need to try to go to sleep.